It was interesting to read in Kimberly Dozier's story on NPR recently, one comment that she made about empathy versus sympathy. We've talked about that before on this blog, somewhat obliquely; and it was nice to hear the same sentiment expressed by another. Dozier, you'll remember, is the CBS news reporter who was seriously injured in a car bomb explosion in Iraq. She recently published an op-ed piece in the Washington Post, simply entitled, "War's Wounds Need More Study," a topic she could speak about from intimate experience. In the question and answer session that followed, here's one interesting snippet of what she had to say::
On a personal note, I hate sympathy, thanks, and so do the injured troops I've met. Makes my stomach turn. Empathy is welcome, however, and appropriate for anyone injured in that conflict, whatever any of us think about ...it....
(Click here to read the NPR story; or listen to the audio file.)
What is it about those two words that makes them so different? Language arts teachers would probably say it has something to do with the difference between connotative and denotative meaning. What the words literally mean is one thing -- denotative -- but it's the accretion of context that's changed them in our ears, so that when we hear them, we hear something different - perhaps the difference between compassion and pity? "Sympathy" is basically, "I feel sorry for you," emphasis on "I" (the 'me'). Empathy has come to mean, "I'm sorry with you," emphasis on "you" (the 'other'). There really is a difference. Some say, as Dozier's comment underscores, that it's a difference you can actually feel.
